Afraid of the Tears

by Charlie Phillips

Having trundled around this place we call earth for threescore plus years means I grew up in an era when men were not allowed to show any emotion. Men were to be tough, don’t cry, real men don’t cry, etc. Men are the strong protectors, the breadwinner and warrior and the only emotion allowed is anger. Is it any wonder this world is messed up.

Now there is nothing wrong with being a strong protector, the breadwinner or even the warrior if you are protecting your loved ones. Being a strong shoulder to lean on is a good thing. Where did we ever get the idea that to be all of these things we couldn’t have emotions? If a man cried there must be something wrong with him, he was a sissy, (that was the term used in my youth) he was weak, and or he was effeminate. His peers would shun him.

So if a man cries is he weak? I don’t think so; I think he is just honest with himself. Maybe a better word would be he is strong enough. He is strong enough not to worry that someone will see him cry and yet open enough to let his emotions flow.

Crying can be for sorrow or for joy so why is it considered a weakness. Crying because some event just makes you happy, means your weak? I think we live in a warped world where reality has been pushed aside for something more programmed. That’s what all of these taboo’s are, just programmed responses that we have been taught, that we are suppose obey.

Whoever started this nonsense probably knew that if they could get us to accept this programming that we would never be able to find the spirit within us. That is the fear all controllers have, that we might wake up.

Lets go back to the original question, why is it wrong for a man to cry? I don’t consider a man whining about something to be in the category of crying. I mean for a man to cry because something makes him happy or sad. If we are not allowed to show our true emotions how can we ever know who we are?

I think that’s the real problem, a lot of us are afraid to find out who we really are. That is the first problem we have to overcome, until we decide we want to know ourselves and search for the truth, we’ll never find it. The truth can’t be found by going to some church, psychiatrist or any other guru. The real truth has to be found within yourself, when you start from there you might start to discover the truth. This is not to say that you should ignore the above mentioned, but most of them will be prejudice by their own beliefs. So the real truth has to be found with research on your own and an honest desire to find the truth. Be willing to open yourself up to things that might appear a little strange to you. Sometimes it might even go against all that you have believed in the past. That doesn’t mean you have to believe it, just have an open mind. A word of warning, you might just find yourself saying a little bit in the future, that is so real.

We have been programmed into fear. We fear we might be weak, might not have enough money, or we may lose our job. Fear is a terrible motivator but that is what most of us operate on. It’s like a big noose around our neck. As long as we don’t make any sudden or strange moves everything is ok. Start questioning the status quo and that noose gets a little tighter. Now here’s a novel idea, how about just taking that noose off. Lets start finding out who and what we are. We get back what we put out, so lets stop putting out the fear. Careful if you’re a male, you might find yourself crying, maybe just for the joy of it.



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